Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Why Humor?

    In this Podcast interview with Robert Moore, a talented writer from Ohio, I answer the question "Why Humor?" and talk about some of my humor writing techniques.

    I hope you find it fun to listen to my method of telling about the stupid things I've done that lead to opening reader's hearts to Jesus.

    If you'd like to cut to the part where Robert and I chat, start at 25:04.

Saturday, April 15, 2017

Three Recipes with Only Four Ingredients Each

Three Recipes with Only Four Ingredients Each

Our favorite chicken recipe for busy times 
Searching for some easy, quick recipes for Easter weekend or Mother's Day? Here are three recipes with only four ingredients each! A main dish, a salad, and a gelatin dessert to help you save time cooking, so you can spend more time with those you love...

Jeanette's Secret Recipe for Chicken Chests:

4 boneless skinless chicken chest halves (1 lb.)
1 cup Italian salad dressing
2 Tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
1 cup Italian seasoned croutons, crushed

Place chicken in a greased 9-in square baking dish. 
Drizzle with salad dressing. 
Roll chests in crushed croutons and sprinkle with cheese. 
Bake, uncovered, at 375 degrees for 20-25 minutes or until chicken juices run clear. Yield: 4 servings.

If you wonder why we call them Chicken Chests instead of Breasts, see my book Two Scoops of Grace with Chuckles on Top and read the chapter entitled Can Preachers Have Sex on Sundays?

crunchy, sweet and tangy
Easy Peasy Cheesy Salad:

1 bag (20-26 oz.) frozen peas
1 cup light mayonnaise
8 oz. mild or sharp cheddar cheese, cubed
1 tsp. season salt

Mix frozen peas and cheese cubes,
Toss with mayonnaise.
Add season salt.
Refrigerate till ready to serve. (You may add chopped fresh onions if your family likes them). Yield: 6-8 servings.

Fruity Easter Cake:
Before baking

1 large can fruit cocktal
1 box yellow or white cake mix
1 cube of butter or margarine
1 (8 oz.) tub of whipped dairy topping

DO NOT DRAIN fruit cocktail. Pour fruit cocktail into bottom of 9 x 13-inch baking pan.
Dump dry cake mix onto fruit cocktail, spreading evenly over top.
Slice butter or margarine and distribute over the top of the dry cake mix.
Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes or until cake has soaked up liquid from fruit cocktail.

When ready to serve, top with whipped dairy topping. Yield: 6-8 servings.

Do you have a favorite recipe that makes holidays simpler? 

Happy Jesus' Resurrection Day! May the Lord bless you from your tippy toes to your polka dot hair bows!

Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Are you broken? Me too.

Are you broken? If you said 'yes,' good for you. You realize you're not perfect and need help. We're all broken in one place or another. That's why we have a Good Shepherd, Jesus, to heal and restore us. 

And why He gave us each other. Working, loving, and sharing together, we can help each other heal in all those broken places we may not even be aware of. 

I collect sheep. Recently I noticed one of them had a broken leg. I don't even know how it happened, and never found the missing piece. You can see in the photo above that next to the other sheep, it's hardly noticeable. He stands as straight as his brother.

But when he's alone, you can spot the broken part right away. He seems smaller and more vulnerable. You want to pick him up and help him along his journey. 

We need each other. Let's come alongside a broken sister or brother today and say, "I love you. I'm here for you. 
It doesn't matter how you got broken. Jesus and I will help you heal." 

P.S. I am broken, too. And I need you. I appreciate you stopping by this blog, your kind words and thoughts, and your friendship, whether I've met you face to face or just know you by blogging. You are a dear lamb. 

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

It’s a Small(er) World

I noticed the other night at supper how napkins are shrinking. It’s bad enough that they fluff them with air pockets to make them look plump; now they are decreasing their dimensions.  One used to cover my whole lap; now it barely fits on the top third of one thigh. If they keep this up, I’ll need half a package at each meal. 

Candy bars have also been shrinking with the times.  It used to take me five bites to eat my 100 Grand bar; now I have to get out Grandma’s magnifying glass to see it before I pop it into my mouth in one nibble.

And have you seen how the ice cream containers went from half a gallon to 1.5 quarts? We used to serve ice cream with our birthday cake; now we simply wave the carton over each plate as a sweet remembrance of the way things were.
Coffee can shrinkage is another travesty.  Remember when coffee was sold by the pound? Now it comes in  12 or 13 oz. packages, for the same price.  Soon they’ll be selling it by the cup, and charging $3.50. Oh, they’re already doing that!

TV shows now take up only forty-five minutes instead of fifty-two. Today's cars are the size of my grandchild's scooter. Even Band-aids barely cover a boo-boo anymore. 

I'm so relieved that Jesus' love never shrinks or diminishes in strength. Jesus stays the same year after year, century after century, forever--even if my favorite pants shrink to the size of a dinner napkin. 

The above is an excerpt from my second book, The Heart of Humor: Sixty Helpings of Hilarity to Nourish Your Soul.

What have you noticed shrinking in your world? 

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Chimpanzee Roller Derby vs. A Business Meeting

I hate meetings. Oh dear, perhaps hate is too strong a word. I detest, loathe and gnash my teeth at the thought of them.  I’d rather watch the Chimpanzee Roller Derby Queen Pageant than attend a meeting.
            Yes, I understand their function: get Dennis, Rachael, Twila, Bob and Kate together in one place to discuss a few matters and make decisions. It saves time and creates unity, right? Well…
            The last time the leader of a group I belong to called a meeting, our agenda had only two items. We needed to decide what day and time we’d have our monthly meetings, and discuss what we expected to accomplish in the group. Trouble was, none of us could agree on a meeting day and time to have our meeting-planning meeting.  But that’s okay with me. It saved me suffering through another meeting.
            My husband once spent ninety minutes listening to grown men on a church board discuss what type of pencil sharpeners to put in the Sunday school classrooms, and how much they’d cost. A year and a half later, the classrooms remained sharpener-less. Not only did I feel sorry for all those kids with dull pencils; I could have found a household chore or two for my honey to do in that ninety minutes he wasted.      
"That is so funny, dude!"
I'd like to form a No-Meeting Club, created for doing away with unnecessary meetings.  We’ll meet once a month to tell horror stories of lengthy, inane meetings we’ve attended. We’ll take turns pontificating on the virtues of a meeting-less society. Then we’ll discuss everyone’s thoughts, hashing over ideas for, say, thirty seconds. After that, we’ll concentrate on something significant and edifying.
            Our only rule will be: No pouting or food throwing if the chimp you’re rooting for doesn’t win the pageant.
Do you have an inane meeting story to share?